Humour

Questions and Answers from the Retired

Question: How many days in a week?
Answer: 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday.

Question: When is a retiree’s bedtime?
Answer: Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.

Question: How many retirees to change a light bulb?
Answer: Only one, but it might take all day.

Question: What’s the biggest gripe of retirees?
Answer: There is not enough time to get everything done.

Question: Why don’t retirees mind being called Seniors? 
Answer: The term comes with a 10% percent discount.

Question: Among retirees what is considered formal attire?
Answer: Tied shoes.

Question: Why do retirees count pennies?
Answer: They are the only ones who have the time.

Question: What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire?
Answer: Nuts!

Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?
Answer: They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.

Question: What do retirees call a long lunch?
Answer: Normal.

Question: What is the best way to describe retirement?
Answer: The never ending Coffee Break.

Question: What’s the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
Answer: If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.

Question: Why does a retiree often say he doesn’t miss work, but misses the people he used to work with?
Answer: He is too polite to tell the whole truth.

Question: What do you do all week?
Answer: Monday to Friday – Nothing. Saturday and Sunday, I rest!

– author unknown
– contributed by Betty

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5 Comments

  1. I’m pleased to know that you enjoyed it, Muckey. More humour to come soon!

    Maria

  2. great post! thanks…

  3. Glad you enjoyed it. 🙂 It’s always fun to have a good laugh.

    Maria

  4. Great Post, Thank you for the info, it was much needed.

  5. I’m glad you found it interesting. 🙂 Let us know what happens when you implement some of it. – Also my apologies for a tardy reply which will be explained in an upcoming addition to this blog.

    Maria

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